#36

Supposedly this blog shall contain novels, short stories, poems and not much of a journal but I’ve never been one to resort to rules unless they involve hurting other people. I’ve been itching to write this all this time.

I’ve been having a Naruto: Shippuden marathon and you can’t imagine how thankful I am that the anime has finally caught up with the latest issues of the manga because I’ve been getting impatient with all the fillers they insert. Of course, some of the fillers are essential in order for viewers to understand a certain character’s nature; there were some that weren’t in the manga and probably something that the producers added so that the anime would keep its pace with the manga which I found entertaining while there were some which I skip because I think it bears no relevance to the story (Though some of you may argue that “Oh, it helped Naruto grow into a fine shinobi that he is” WELL DUH HE’S FIGHTING WITH MADARA NOW, RIGHT, WHEN EVERYONE ELSE IS UNDER THE INFINITE TSUKUYOMI but anyway we all know that he’s going to end up into a fine shinobi, we don’t need the other unnecessary tidbits like the “chikara (power)” episodes.)

I’m just going to list my top 5 favorite characters in Naruto (in order) and the reasons why I lurve them:

1. Uchiha Itachi (Konoha)

  • This guy. You can’t imagine how much I respect this guy. How I wish there were more people like him existing in this haunted world as it makes me regain my faith in humanity. He starts off as a cold person who murdered his clan for the sake of “measuring his abilities” and to awaken his Mangekyo Sharingan, which admittedly is rather selfish of him no matter how his reason seemed quite unconvincing to me before–you murdered your parents just like that because you wanted to test how skilled you are. REALLY. So when Sasuke, his younger brother whom he didn’t touch because he thought killing him wasn’t worth anything, was about to kill him back in Konoha, Itachi beats him up and tells him that he’s weak because the former doesn’t hate him enough to actually thirst for power, leading Sasuke astray to the point that he defected from the village and sought out for Orochimaru.Then, it actually turns out that the Uchiha were planning a coup d’etat with reasons that trace back to the foundation of the village, and of course, a civil war will erupt in Konoha. Once their military forces have been weakened, other villages will strike to gain control over the weaker village and thus, another ninja war will erupt. Itachi was against this, being a pacifist and he’s only thinking of what would benefit the village rather than giving in to his clan’s selfish decisions, so while he did bear the idea of peace in mind, he had to disregard his emotions and carry on the mission given to him by Danzo to eradicate his entire clan with the exception of Sasuke, under Itachi’s request. Afterward, he joined Akatsuki in order to unravel its secrets and send information back to Konoha.So he was actually a good guy and everything he has ever done had a good reason behind it. He’s a true hero who doesn’t seek fame or to be remembered–he was the epitome of how a true shinobi should be, working in the shadows, all for keeping the peace and valuing the safety of the people around him.

    I never liked Itachi since I’ve always perceived him to be a mean person from the beginning, but learning about his character has taught me a great number of things. I couldn’t contain my emotions when I found out the truth about him, all the sacrifices he had done just to preserve the safety of the villagers in Konoha and for the benefit of the shinobi world as well, and that he truly loved his younger brother, who has always seen him as an obstacle that he must overcome, that while Sasuke wished for Itachi to perish in his hands, Itachi actually intended for this to happen so that Sasuke may be viewed as a hero in the village for killing a rogue ninja. It’s the little things that this guy does that kills me inside.

    Itachi was meant for 1st place. He’s just a hero amongst heroes. He received hatred instead of love, pain instead of comfort, putting himself aside for the sake of others as these people continue to lash him with insults when they’re completely ignorant of all the sacrifices Itachi has done. My heart goes out for Itachi, and yes, he deserves to top this list.

2. Namikaze Minato (Konoha)

  • Alright, so Minato rarely graces the television with his presence, so I reckoned that there isn’t much information on him regarding his character, his past, the problems he had faced that sum up to a hot chunk of meat that he turned out to be–just that he became the fourth hokage and also Naruto’s father. But from what the anime has shown so far, he seems like a genuinely kind person who’s also wise and can assess a situation soundly; he’s a very shrewd person, and a unique child whom Jiraiya believed may be the child of the prophecy that would bring peace to the world. He’s handsome too, he became a hokage and he sacrificed his life to protect the village–just how noble can this guy get?I mean, sure, he’s not perfect. But the way the anime describes him is just… leaning towards the idea that he’s the best character to have ever existed in the series, and he just had to die. Why? One, because it wouldn’t be Naruto after all, right, since he’s going to snatch up the screen time due to his perfection. Two, because we might get to notice these imperfections of his as the series progresses, and our image of a perfect yondaime hokage will be shattered into pieces, and we should just preserve his legacy up until that moment, for he’s already done so many things that he couldn’t top all that off now, can he?

    So he wasn’t there when Naruto was growing up, having died after protecting the village and sealing the nine-tailed beast inside Naruto. In spite of his relationship with Naruto, not a lot of people actually know about this father-son tandem as the third hokage kept mum over it, because the other nations know that the fourth hokage sealed the nine-tailed beast in his son, and he feared that this may jeopardize Naruto’s safety.

    What bothers me is that if he has trained with Jiraiya, SURELY, in some way, he must have gone through THAT phase. Although the anime doesn’t elaborate on that because hello, the fourth hokage is supposed to be perfect, perhaps there were a few times when he had to train under Jiraiya in the hot springs, and he would catch his master peeping at girls and all that.

    And I”m curious as to how he wooed Kushina. Aw, their love story yeehee. Anyway, Masashi Kishimoto announced that he plans to create a spin-off involving Minato, so I guess we Minato fans will be looking forward to that.

3. Gaara (Sand)

  • GAARA. You are so misunderstood, and you try so hard to keep it real in this world which is why you’re hurting.
  • If you haven’t done a background check on Gaara, he’s basically the son of the fourth kazekage in the Sand Village and also the former Jinchuriki of the Ichibi and has been experimented both physically and psychologically to find out what he’s capable of. He was frowned upon by society due to the tailed beast he possesses and lived his life alone, thinking that no one actually loves him (not even his own mother) but as the series progresses, we discover that Gaara has become open and gained a lot of companions after meeting Naruto, and while he fought with the reanimated corpse of his father, the fourth kazekage claimed that his mother truly loved him; that the sand barrier that surrounded him wasn’t a result of the beast that used to be inside of him, but were the actions of his mother, whose will lives on through the sand in his gourd and protects him from physical harm.
  • And why does he rank #3 on this list? Because he’s an adorable little piece of shit, that’s why. He’s one of those people who decided to stand up because he knows crying won’t get him anywhere, and if he wants to be accepted, he has to do something about it. He’s not an idiot who’d prefer to mope around and wallow in self-pity or how bad his life has become; he’s actually doing something about it, and I say we can learn a lot from Gaara.

4. Sasori (Sand)

I guess my heart goes soft whenever people like Sasori step into the picture. He is a victim of the shinobi world. He first started creating puppets in the image of his parents because it’s been a while since he actually saw them (when in fact, they were killed in action by Hatake Sakumo, the father of Hatake Kakashi). But when reality crashed unto Sasori—that these puppets couldn’t exactly take his parents’ place—he become a power-hungry man who desires to create puppets out of humans (like how he murdered the third kazekage, who’s considered to be the most powerful kazekage yet, in order to make him a puppet and use him to his own advantage).
I love being around children. I love how idealistic they are of the world and how their hearts aren’t corrupted by evil, but when their innocence gets tainted, you know shit just got real. In the end, he is stopped by his grandmother and Sakura.

5. Utakata (Mist)

Not much is mentioned about Utakata in the manga, but the anime delves deep into the life of the Six Tail Jinchuriki who deserted his village. After his master tried to extract the Six Tailed Beast from him, Utakata stopped believing in relationships between one’s master and a disciple, but his meeting with Hotaru changed him (as well as Naruto and the gang).

I must say besides the Sanbi arc, this is my favorite filler yet. I love his technique of using bubbles as weapons, and how he’s laidback almost every time you see him. I wanted him to start a romantic affair with Hotaru because you have to admit, they look good together, but it seems like this will never happen since he died while Akatsuki extracted the Rokubi from him.

Utakata reminds me of myself. He becomes a wanderer without the slightest clue what to do next because we lost our faith in the system. But he starts believing again, and rather than spending his lifetime doing nothing, he takes up on the decision to become Hotaru’s master. However, he dies.

 

[Meanwhile I also like Deidara, Hidan, Kakashi and Shikamaru]

By the way, Naruto 682 left me flabbergasted. I could not believe that he actually unleashed a reverse harem jutsu on Kaguya, and what’s worse is that she actually fell for it!! Like, this manga is just so bizarre that I was kicking my feet in the air, screaming “WHYYYYYY”. I swear, Masashi Kishimoto is fucked up. You never saw that coming. I thought it was an even more powerful technique than the rasen-shuriken so I was excited and all but when I read that it’s actually a harem jutsu, you could say that I was like Kakashi, trying to assess the situation because fuck, Kaguya is the most powerful enemy you could ever face and yet you unleashed that!?! REALLY, NARUTO. YOU ARE THE NUMBER ONE MOST UNPREDICTABLE NINJA EVER. Ugh why can’t you be like your father? LOL. =))))

Ah, this fandom. ❤

#35

Let me recount the day that I’ve decided to gather all sense that remained and erase myself from existence–from the world that mainly revolved around you.

You were just a nice guy. I was too naive for a fourteen year old girl back then. Looking back, I kind of feel sorry for my fourteen year old self, realizing how confused she must have been from all that: she played the fool, the immature brat just to grab people’s attentions; the bitch who hurt people with the words she had said, and never asked for forgiveness; the kid who’s obviously in love with a guy who’s much older than she is.

And I was expecting that you’d see me differently, or even take me seriously. But I was placing my hopes too high.

Back then, I believed that there must be something. I prayed that there would be. But you know, my eighteen year old self sees it as a game–child’s play, to be more specific–and I was taking the game too seriously while throwing away all resources of value, eventually leaving me with my final trump card after spending three years succumbing to defeat: I raised my white flag, surrendering these emotions as I draw back from the table and leave.

And you just stood there, listening as I ended the conversation.

Perhaps you still perceived me as a child at that period, thinking that I may not be able to handle the truth. You are too gentle, and I hate that about you. You couldn’t hurt others for their own sake so that they may move on with their lives; you leave them hanging. Like a candle, providing warmth and light with its flame until you realize that the wax is running out, and soon, disappears. You never took me seriously. But then I guess it’s also my fault. I hoped.

For mutual affection. For understanding. For a breakthrough. Meeting halfway. A relationship that might not work but we’d try anyway.

I’ve become greedy.

So what am I trying to say here? Nothing, perhaps. Just composing my thoughts and recollecting as July fast approaches; remembering the times you made me laugh when the days couldn’t get any worse, or when you’d make an effort to post music videos while chatting online so that there’d be music while we talk–the same songs that we listen to as we conversed, to make it feel like we were next to each other; when you’d go out of your way to send me that message on that mini-reunion among our friends and how I missed it, and that maybe, just maybe, you felt the same way.

And now it’s like we never existed in each others’ memories.

I know this will never reach you. Even if it does, you’d doubt that it’s from me. But I’ll say it anyway.

I hope that in the depths of your heart, even as tiny as a speck of dust, please keep me there, no matter how trivial or a nuisance my existence may be, as I have always done with you all this time. I hope that I may be remembered as someone who made your days easier, who made you forget all of your problems even for just a moment, who enjoyed your company in those three years. I hope I crossed your mind even once throughout all these years to make up for the countless times that you had crossed mine since the day I bade farewell, as pathetic as it sounds. I hope that you may find the time to take care of your health, recalling how you’d sleep late at night to keep track with the conversations in the chatroom and how exhausted you were from work, and that life has become much kinder to you now. I hope that you find yourself someone who’d share your laughter and who’d always be present by your side; someone who could actually stand next to you–something that I could never do back then–and that you’d love her immensely to the point that you couldn’t imagine life without her. And lastly, even as strangers passing each other at a train station or at the sidewalk, at one point in our lives, I hope that we may meet again, and I would smile at you, and you’d do the same, not because of the past, but because we’re glad that both of us are happy and contented with our respective lives, despite how different they may be.

Although my childish hopes back then had faded, these are the things that I hope would come true. Maybe not now, but perhaps one day. Because I keep you in this abstract time capsule in my head, and whenever I feel like it, I can pull you out and recall the good ol’ days. However, nostalgia doesn’t get the best of me and I’d place you back there, sealing you and keeping you there, and days would pass and I wouldn’t even notice it. That’s where you belong as I continue this adventure called life, buried in the ground I once walked on until such a time I feel like returning to it again, but I wouldn’t be dwelling there for long.

Oh, and thank you. Because admittedly, you were necessary to my growth and because you mattered.


 

And thus, therapy ends here. I’ve vented it out. I have no plans of showing this to that person whatsoever, and perhaps people may be wondering why do I even bother posting it here. Well, since most of my computers break down eventually, I decided to write my journals on the internet so that I may access it anywhere. No, I don’t wish for people to be entertained by this, or that this post may even be read by people. I’d like to think no one else is reading it; that way, it’d be less humiliating for my part, because what I’ve written sounds like a cliche unrequited love story that people might not even comprehend and would just laugh at it. Though secretly, it’s comforting to hear that some people do feel the same way. I’m just a troubled soul for crying out loud.

But I’m still making it public. Who knows what this can do besides place me in an utterly awkward situation? Heehee.